August 17, 2004
Pecking away at the paperwork
The first thing we did was send in our petition to adopt. Then we received a notice from Immigration to report for our fingerprinting. During that drive to downtown Detroit on a cold January morning, I asked my spouse, "Hey, have you ever been arrested?"
The government office was sparse, with hard, gray folding chairs and a small TV in the corner. Families were chattering nervously in various languages.
We were fingerprinted on these cool machines that don't require any ink on the fingers. When I was finished, the woman said, "Good luck." I didn't know whether she meant good luck on your criminal background check or the adoption.
Nonetheless, we were happy to get out of there. It was the same feeling we get when we go to the gate at the bridge to Canada. We say, "OK, don't look suspicious."
Our home study was pleasant enough to get through. We had one visit together with the social worker, then each of us separately, then she visited our home. I wish we would have perfected our pinch/nudge technique. You know the one that you use when you think your spouse is saying too much, too little, or the wrong thing. It seemed like the social worker was writing more when John talked. I kept leaning forward and squinting to try to read her notes. But we did OK! She seemed to like us.
The medical forms were the biggest hassle in this process. Ukraine kept changing the format. So we made three trips each to our doctors. I remember looking at my TB markings and, knowing I didn't have it, still felt relieved when it went away.
Next stop: fingerprinting at the local police. Hint: I saw jail cells!
August 04, 2004
The long road
Hey, let's go back to the beginning of this story.
In the fall of 2003, John and I decided to consider adopting a child. We have the room in our home and our hearts. We have a wonderful biological 9-year-old boy and figured we would love to have a little girl. I did a ton of research on domestic and international adotion on the Internet. It's overwhelming! There is so much out there to read.
I stumbled across a website on international adoption and selected various countries to learn about the process. In some countries, you are shown a picture and maybe a video of a child that they deem appropriate for you, based on your application. But in Ukraine, you go to the country before a child is picked out and you decide there which one best fits in with your family. That sounded great. The children in the orphanages looked like our family==we are desendants of Eastern Europeans.
So now what?? We decided to do an independent adoption, which means no agency. We wanted to save some money, and I'm kind of a stickler for getting things done in my time frame. Fast! But I must say that the appointments and mounds of paperwork were almost too much to bear!
So here's what we did: We took one step at a time. If you look too far ahead in the process, you may get discouraged. We sent in our forms and got fingerprinted and then started pecking away at the paperwork.
So that's the name of my next entry: Pecking away at the paperwork! Stay tuned.
Laura